Reviews from

Ben Paul Persons

Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Ben Paul Persons, Ch. 15"
A fresh calling

8 total reviews 
Comment from Wendy G
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Clever thinking, to notice the woman was not afraid, and had opened the vault herself. So she is actually an accomplice. Ben Paul might be old,but he still has his wits about him, even noticing the car tailing them and working out how to get rid of it.
Wendy

 Comment Written 09-Jan-2025


reply by the author on 09-Jan-2025
    Thank you. Without an antagonist, the story needs tension inserted on a regular basis. I greatly appreciate your comments.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

So, they are going to investigate the bank robbery on their own. Ben Paul has a good idea how to not be bothered while they watch the bank. Too bad they can't trust the police.

 Comment Written 09-Jan-2025


reply by the author on 09-Jan-2025
    Thank you for your very nice review. The police are sometimes lazy, and sometimes have an agenda.
Comment from Ric Myworld
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dodge City takes me back a ways. Yes, sir, I can remember Chester yelling Marshall Dillion on most every episode. Well, either Marshall Dillion or Mr. Dillion, which I always thought was old. But the people who made the show explained the Mr. was used to show respect for the Marshall. Thanks for sharing another fine chapter.

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2025


reply by the author on 08-Jan-2025
    Thank you. I hated splitting this chapter in two.
    I liked Festus as much as Chester.
reply by Ric Myworld on 08-Jan-2025
    Me TOO! Great show with fantastic characters.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A good chapter, Wayne. I would be afraid to speak with anyone in a small town like that, for fear that they were connected to the robbers in some way.

See you soon.

xo
Pam

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2025


reply by the author on 08-Jan-2025
    Thank you. They were in a pickle.
Comment from jim vecchio
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another excellent chapter. Ben's directions to Sylvia seemed like something Sam Spade would do. It will e interesting to see how ?Ben gets out of this mess.

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2025


reply by the author on 08-Jan-2025
    Not Matt Dillon's Dodge.
    Thank you for the very nice review.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another strong chapter! The dialogue between Ben Paul and Sylvia feels real. It is sharp and natural. Ben Paul's maneuver to evade their tail was clever. You kept me interested and wanting more in this chapter. And I think you left room for further suspense. Fantastic work!

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2025


reply by the author on 08-Jan-2025
    Thank you very much! It pained me to split this chapter.
Comment from Lana Marie
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another chapter well done. It's so detailed in their conversation so the reader is able to delve into what is going on pretty quickly. Detector shows with the suspect and the suspects trying to figure out who really commit the crime. Now I'm curious as to who leaned in and puckered their lips. Nice job. Maybe you are supposed to write a novel lol.

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2025


reply by the author on 08-Jan-2025
    Thank you! Actually... this is close to the end (10 more chapters) of a 240,000 word novel. Appreciate your kindness.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Ben Paul is so smart and observant! No one, it seems, is going to get the better of him. But he's up against corruption and lies and, as an outsider, is bound to be targeted. Lovely, compelling dialogue, even humour from Sylvia, which gives light relief to a difficult situation for them. The chapter seems perfectly measured and ends on a hook to draw us in for the quest ahead. Thanks for sharing, as ever, a faultless read, Wayne. Take care Debbie

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2025


reply by the author on 08-Jan-2025
    Thank you immensely for your very kind review!