Introducing My New Boyfriend
A relationship on the rocks already (50 words)27 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This fifty-word story or dribble, Introducing My New Boyfriend, has the required word count and lets us know you have a taste for tuxedo-clad fellows. This one seems a bit stiff.
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2019
  |
This fifty-word story or dribble, Introducing My New Boyfriend, has the required word count and lets us know you have a taste for tuxedo-clad fellows. This one seems a bit stiff.
Comment Written 06-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2019
-
Thanks for reviewing, Bill. That was my first one, before i got into my stride with looser humour. That was the one that gave me the idea. I have since done a series, up to number 8 so far... different animals; reviewers say they are getting funnier.
Comment from poetwatch
I can see that my attention is not needed. You date guys in suits, I wear only tee-shirts, LisaMay. It is good to see you, now I have an ideal who reads my stuff. :) This is a good entry for the Dribble Flash Fiction contest.
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2019
|
I can see that my attention is not needed. You date guys in suits, I wear only tee-shirts, LisaMay. It is good to see you, now I have an ideal who reads my stuff. :) This is a good entry for the Dribble Flash Fiction contest.
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2019
-
Haha... I am a t-shirt and jeans person myself. That penguin was showing me up. He had to go.
Comment from lyenochka
Lol. So "he'll never fly" and the relationship will "never fly." You of course, have to end with a pun - it's so you! Thanks for the giggles and another cute picture!
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
|
Lol. So "he'll never fly" and the relationship will "never fly." You of course, have to end with a pun - it's so you! Thanks for the giggles and another cute picture!
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
-
Thanks for your review! More critters are on the way.
Comment from w.j.debi
Well there goes the love at first sight opportunity. You're probably right though, this romance can't really fly since you have so little in common. Your writing is concise, humous and fun to read.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
|
Well there goes the love at first sight opportunity. You're probably right though, this romance can't really fly since you have so little in common. Your writing is concise, humous and fun to read.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
-
Sigh... love is so problematic. Thanks for your review - I just posted another one in the series. I am having fun writing them and people seem to be having fun reading them.
Comment from C. Gale Burnett
So comical! You've got something going here!
I love how the line that introduces the story not only describes a failed relationship but also relates directly with the boyfriend (Mr. Penguin).
The story without the photo almost reads like a riddle (guessing the boyfriend).
You do a great job incorporating the attributes of the animal to that of human relationships.
I love the photograph! You could do a whole book on this theme.
Very, very worthy of six stars :)
Best wishes in the contest :)
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
 |
So comical! You've got something going here!
I love how the line that introduces the story not only describes a failed relationship but also relates directly with the boyfriend (Mr. Penguin).
The story without the photo almost reads like a riddle (guessing the boyfriend).
You do a great job incorporating the attributes of the animal to that of human relationships.
I love the photograph! You could do a whole book on this theme.
Very, very worthy of six stars :)
Best wishes in the contest :)
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
-
Thank you very much for your validating review... because I enjoyed writing this one so much, my imagination went into overdrive and now I have written my 'relationships' with several more critters - cat, kangaroo, snake, horse, whale, dog, mouse, tortoise and albatross. Unfortunately (but obviously) I do not have photos of myself with all of the creatures. I might post them as chapters of a book here. Do you think that is best, or keep posting them as random dribbles?
-
Lisa, I refuse to answer on the grounds that I might fail you (LOL). Either way, you will be a success. These stories are well thought out and very entertaining. I just do not want to lead you in the wrong direction because I am CLUELESS. You need to ask the Fanstorian experts :)
Hugs,
Gale
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written dribble flash fiction about the new boyfriend. There is not much you have in common do the relationship is doomed to end up in the rocks.
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
|
A very well-written dribble flash fiction about the new boyfriend. There is not much you have in common do the relationship is doomed to end up in the rocks.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
-
Thanks for reviewing, Sandra. Have a lovely day!
Comment from JudyE
Well done. At least this guy's breath wouldn't have been fishy. I guess on the scale of 1 to 10 he didn't rate too highly though. You're right. It'll never fly. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
|
Well done. At least this guy's breath wouldn't have been fishy. I guess on the scale of 1 to 10 he didn't rate too highly though. You're right. It'll never fly. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
-
He's got fish-breath AND squid-breath!
I've been writing a whole menagerie of these relationships I'm having with animals. I posted another one featuring a monkey, and tonight I got a few more ready for posting sometime - rat, horse, whale, and albatross; it's fun.
-
It's a great idea. I saw the monkey one but haven't 'reviewed' it yet.
Comment from Jesse James Doty
This is delightful. I love the title and the line above it. The play on words is clever and fun to read. Phrases such as 'your new boyfriend' and 'on the rocks' have double meanings and are playful. The story is well written, and intriguing throughout. I love your tongue-in-cheek response, as you describe the relationship you have, with this Penguin. I smiled when I read the last line. 'It'll never fly' has a double meaning, as well. Your doomed relationship because of your differences, and the flightless bird which is unable to fly. Your notes are very interesting, and add to the knowledge, of what I knew about the species. Thank you for sharing your talent.
Take care, Jesse
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
|
This is delightful. I love the title and the line above it. The play on words is clever and fun to read. Phrases such as 'your new boyfriend' and 'on the rocks' have double meanings and are playful. The story is well written, and intriguing throughout. I love your tongue-in-cheek response, as you describe the relationship you have, with this Penguin. I smiled when I read the last line. 'It'll never fly' has a double meaning, as well. Your doomed relationship because of your differences, and the flightless bird which is unable to fly. Your notes are very interesting, and add to the knowledge, of what I knew about the species. Thank you for sharing your talent.
Take care, Jesse
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
-
Thanks for your review, Jesse. I had fun writing it and it was well received. I see scope for a series on inter-species relationships. (I can't seem to attract a male of my own species so I will invent ones with animals, haha.) I just posted another one, this time with a monkey.
-
You've got a great, positive outlook, at not being able to find one of your own species. Try others. Why not? Your good humor and tenacity will see you through. Enjoying what you write is a wonderful feeling. I am glad this was well received. It most certainly should be.
Take care, Jesse
-
Life is good. I like animals so it is nice to write about them and share some fun with others.
-
Nice to hear. I like animals also.
Comment from Sharon Haiste
This is a fun little entry for the Dribble Flash Fiction.
Your story is clear and well written.
Well done and good luck to you with the contest.
Sharon
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
|
This is a fun little entry for the Dribble Flash Fiction.
Your story is clear and well written.
Well done and good luck to you with the contest.
Sharon
Comment Written 29-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
-
Hi Sharon, thanks for your review. Much appreciated.
Comment from Kathleen S.
That's fun. Your dribble fiction made me laugh. The imagery of your words go well with the picture you've chosen. It's not only enjoyable to reader,but it's cute. Excellent.
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
|
That's fun. Your dribble fiction made me laugh. The imagery of your words go well with the picture you've chosen. It's not only enjoyable to reader,but it's cute. Excellent.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
-
Oh good... I love it when something I've written gets a laugh from somebody (hopefully with pleasure rather than derision!) Thanks for your review.
